WATCH VIDEO: 3 of the most important things you can do to help your child cope with your decision to separate.

1. Shield your child from conflict

Children who experience conflict in divorce are more likely to 

• suffer from anxiety
• withdraw into depression, and 
• manifest problems in their own relationships later in life.

The impact can last well into their adult years.

So, make it a rule:  Love your child more than you dislike your ex.

 

2. Look for opportunities to speak well of their other parent

You may no longer love each other but your child loves both of you.

Criticising their other parent can lead a child to question how much they can trust you and your opinions.

 

3. Allow your child to stay neutral

Don't ask your child to take sides or expect them to love you more than their other parent ... regardless of how your relationship ended.

Understand that it is common for kids to tell one parent that they don't like spending time with their other parent, or that they don't like your ex's new partner.

Often, that is only because they worry that if they were to say otherwise, it would make you feel too sad.

Give them permission to have fun when they are not with you.

Don't push them for information about what your ex is up to.

 

Do what is right, even if it's not easy

Putting your children's needs first means they will be happier.

Isn't that what you want for them?

And, for you?

 

Published by: Divorce Resource

More parenting advice and information:

Can one parent legally change a child's surname?

“Help! My ex won’t let me see my children. What can I do?”

At what age can a child decide who they live with?

Relocating to another state with your child after divorce: steps you can take

Mother's who deny fathers access to children could be jailed